The first week home

Oddly I cried when we left the hospital this time. Not when he was born or any other time in the hospital, just on the car ride home. It is weird because I was sad that part was over. Sad I was not pregnant anymore, sad that all the hype about when he was going to arrive was done. Anyone that knows me well knows I am ready to take Christmas decorations down on Christmas day once all the present opening and celebrating is over. I have been like this since I was a kid. I don't actually take it down on Christmas day, but you better believe the very next morning it is all getting packed away. I get a little depressed once it is all over that I want to start on the next thing. I guess it was the same after Crosby's birth. I love being pregnant (no I am not going to try to beat the Duggars) and all the excitement that comes with the blessing of a baby. I know his birth represents the beginning of everything but still I was just a little bit sad.

We have experienced many new things this past week and a half. Some good. Some bad challenging. Hadley has been sick.. like non stop sick basically since we brought Crosby home. Not only that she started day care the day after we brought him home. She had the residual of a cold and a cough since the week before he was born and it has lingered for weeks now. Then last Saturday when my brother and his family were going to come over so all the cousins could meet Hadley woke up from her nap with a 102.6 temp. She was laying on Matt and was really not feeling well. That was a long couple of days. Her temp would come and go depending on if the Motrin had worn off. We took her to the doctor Monday and they said she has bumps on her throat but it was not Strep and that it just had to run its course.

Since it had been over 24 hours since her fever broke and she was acting more normal she went back to school on Tuesday (she is still adjusting to school.. breaks my heart :( ). When Matt picked her up they let him know a kid went home with Hand Foot and Mouth. They were more concerned about Crosby and told Matt to go home bath her and bleach all her clothes. The joys of day care. We have been saying lots of prayers she doesn't get and Crosby doesn't get it. So far she hasn't but it can take a little bit of time to show up. She still has this terrible cough and just coughs and coughs all night long. Judy recommended Zarbee's Children Cough Syrup. It is a natural cough remedy. Matt called the pediatrician to make sure it was okay (were overly cautious about everything when it comes to meds - natural or not). They said before we give it to her to bring her in to have her lungs checked, but it would be fine. So today Crosby has his 2 week appointment at 1:30 and Hadley has a dr. appointment at 2. We ended up giving her some last night because she was coughing so much and it helped for 4 hours. I was afraid to go in there and give her more for fear she may not go back to sleep. Poor girl. This stuff is great and I am thankful for the recommendation Judy :-) We couldn't give her the nighttime kind because they don't recommend it for toddlers under 2.. I am sure it is just because of the melatonin.

Sooo because of Hadley being sick and her being exposed to Hand, Foot and Mouth - me and C have been quarantined to the master bedroom. I come out after they leave and lysol/bleach everything and then we can come out. My hands are so dry and have been cracking and bleeding from how many times I wash or germ-x them. Matt started not feeling well so he isn't even allowed in here. He has been kicked out to the loft apartment upstairs. He loves it though. He said the bed is so comfortable and he gets to sleep through the night; I am afraid he may never come back down :-) He needs his sleep big time though.

Last Wednesday, Hadley stated "school" and is having a little bit of a hard time with it. She is going through sever separation anxiety now (which she never had going to Elsa's.. in fact she cried sometimes when we picked her up to go home) and it very whiny. I am sure the combo of new environment, new baby, and being sick is not helping as well as the terrible twos :-/ Some days she is great and others she is a mess! I read a friends blog post about her daughter (who is 2 weeks older than Hadley) at the zoo and her little meltdown and honestly it made me feel better that I am not alone (thanks Melanie for sharing that awesome story!). I guess they all go through it.

So with all of that with Hadley I have had some issues with nursing. In the hospital he was a nursing champ. He even gained 3 oz while in the hospital and he was exclusively nursing. His pedi said that happens 1 out of 20 newborns. I have to say I gave myself a pat on the back and was feeling very proud. I had such a struggle with Hadley and literally struggled through it for 3 months and had to supplement with every feeding. I just knew this time was going to be different since we had such a successful start. So the second day home he decided he would only nurse on one side.. then when I forced him to nurse on the other side, after much screaming, I went to burp him he spit up blood. I was so freaked out, but knew he wasn't bleeding internally. I figured the latch must be wrong because it was so painful every time he nursed. I would find myself curling my toes and biting my lip in pain. I know it shouldn't be like that.

After talking to his pedi I tried what she recommended. It didn't help very much so I called a Lactation Consultant that had been recommended to me and she was so helpful. She taught me how to make him latch without causing me pain and also how to pump properly. I never knew you were supposed to toggle between the two different modes like 8-10 time per session. Wow what a difference that makes. So she has me on a regimen of nurse, supplement and pump at every feeding during the day and then just nurse or pump and supplement at night. She said I will probably always have to supplement and I am okay with that. I know my thyroid disease and a few other factors play a major role in why I cannot exclusively nurse. She even told me that.. After my experience with the La Leche League with Hadley I was happy to hear she wasn't going to tell me to stay in the bathtub all day and nurse my child on demand - true story of the advice I received from them. I know breast milk is best, but lets be honest a healthy thriving baby is all we want and if it comes from formula or breast milk I am perfectly fine with it. Right now he is getting 1/2 and 1/2 or 2/3 breast milk and 1/3 formula depending on the day. I know that he will start eating more and I hope with all the supplements and water and constant nursing/pumping my supply will increase. However, this time I will not beat myself up and cry all them time if it doesn't!

So that is our first few week as a family of 4. Not the easiest but once everyone is healthy things will start to improve and we can all hang out in the same room :-) We are even taking 2 cars to the pedi.. that is how paranoid we are about him getting sick. I know a little crazy, but I just cannot imagine my teeny tiny baby sick.

Happy Birthday Crosby - February 19, 2012

Here is the story of our last weekend as a family of 3 and Crosby Matthew's birthday.

Last weekend was a busy weekend to say the least..

Friday, I didn't feel well and really didn't work at all. I had stayed late at the office on Thursday and finished up some pending projects and cleared out some campaign mailings that had been sitting there way too long. I told everyone that day it would be the last time I was going to be in the office. It was miserable being there and the drive is so long to Sugar Land I just knew I wouldn't/couldn't do it anymore. Back to Friday, after resting and just answering emails all day I got a little bit of energy that night and finished sewing his bumpers for the crib. It was the last big baby room project on my list.

Saturday, Judy and Toni came over to watch Hadley so we could get the upstairs cleaned and organized. It had been a disaster while we were moving around furniture, getting baby stuff out and putting a bed up there to make it into a loft guest room. We were able to get everything in order and still had time for a date dinner. We went to Pappasitos and enjoyed a nice dinner and what would be our last date night for a long time :-)

Sunday, I woke up and felt the same as before.. tired, huge and well ready to meet this little babe! Little did I know that night I would. I was on a crazy cleaning binge and spent the morning and afternoon vacuuming, dusting, washing and folding clothes (that is odd for me - ha!). I guess you could say some last minute nesting.

About 10 a.m. I could tell something was happening. I was having some pre-labor symptoms so of course I run to my phone and Google them. I see that what was happening to me (I will spare you the exact details) could mean labor soon or in a couple of days. I was happy to know that it meant something even though it didn't tell me when this little guy would make his debut. I am not good at waiting.

Hadley and I stopped cleaning (yes Hadley cleans - we call her Hadley Helper and she loves to swiffer the floor, roll the couch to get the dog hair, and she even tried to vacuum but it was a little heavy and she kept dropping it) for a pudding break. Well she ate pudding.. I just took pictures:

Miss Independent

A little messy, but at least using a spoon..

Forget the spoon I know a better faster way to get the good stuff!

After our pudding break it was nap time and we all went and laid down. I didn't sleep long and neither did Matt, but it was nice to lay down and relax for a little bit. Not long after I woke up I started back cleaning. I was vacuuming the living room when my water broke. Now, it wasn't like when they broke my water with Hadley in the hospital so I question if that was what happened. I didn't say anything to Matt yet. Good thing because he freaked out about getting to the hospital (more on that later). I am not sure if I was in denial or what but I kept cleaning and then went and took a shower. I told Matt what happened and why I kept running to the bathroom.. but I kept saying "I'm not sure though" he finally said well either you keep peeing on yourself or your water broke - which one is it?! I guess I was use to hearing that it is more rare for your water to break not in the hospital. I know it happens, but I was so afraid of going to the hospital and them turning me away because of false labor that I was questioning it.

Soon contractions started. I guess I missed the 10 min - 5 min ones because by the time I started tracking them they were between 2-4 mins apart. Matt called his mom and we got everything ready for the hospital. Matt had put the car seat in that morning - good timing huh?! I am so use to my very calm husband, but this time I was the calm one. He was freaking out that I was going to give birth at home. He kept looking out the window yelling where is my mom.. I was laughing. I told him we had time and not to freak out. He was asking me why I was acting like it was no big deal. It was funny to say the least.. I am sure he has a different opinion.

We got to the hospital around 5 ish and luckily I had registered the previous Thursday (I know I know you are supposed to do that at 7 months - hey at least I did it before I went into labor!). They took me to the L&D room to be checked out and it was the same room Hadley was delivered in! Lucky room 8. She took some info and then checked to see if my water broke. She said the test turned blue right away (+ my water broke) and that I was 4-5 cm dilated. I was admitted to the hospital and an hour later received my epidural and was feeling much better. At that point I was 6 cms. I remember just laying there thinking life is about to be a whole lot different. In a good way of course. The nurse came and checked me around 8 and had me do one push and then told me to stop. She called the doctor because it was time! They originally said it would be in the middle of the night... little did they know Crosby was ready :-)

I had Matt take a picture of the clock and board like we had with Hadley:

Notice the time...

In the picture above no one was in the room except me and Matt. After the Doctor arrived we chatted for a few minutes. It was the on call doctor (Dr. Fogiel) so I had never met her before. They prepped me for delivery and less than 10 mins later Crosby Matthew Kannady was born!

8:34 p.m. 6lb 11oz

Lots of dark brown hair!

Holding daddy's finger

Father and Son's first picture

He was not happy about delivery and was having a little bit of a hard time catching his breath. He was breathing okay it was just rapid and because of this they went to the nursery after about 20 mins. He finially settled down and by the time they wheeled me to my room they had already given him a bath and he was just hanging out getting warm!

That is the story of Crosby's birth weekend. It was an amazing labor and delivery and I feel so blessed to have had such an easy non-eventful delivery. Now if breastfeeding was just as easy :-/ more on that adventure later.

New Year

Yep it is February and I am just now posting for the first time this year... I kid myself if I think I will have more time or be better at this in the next couple of weeks when we will have TWO kids! Wow it is crazy just typing that. We can't wait to meet blessing #2, but I am hoping to go at least another week. We need the weekend to prepare his room (although he will not be in there - I WANT IT DONE!), prep a few meals to freeze, pack our bags, get as much as possible in order and spend what little time we have left as a family of 3.

These past few weeks have been hard for us. Work is difficult, Hadley is a walking accident and has been sick, I have had a lot of pains from pregnancy - issues I didn't have with Hadley, but no Hypertension this time around, and I have had a negative out look on things. I feel like my motto these days is if you want something done right, do it yourself! I have had more trouble with people at work following through with their responsibilities all the way to my dr refilling a prescription. I feel like I have to constantly call and check up to make sure people are doing their job and it is frustrating. Just this morning, I wanted a bagel from Panera, I stopped and picked one up and asked for reduced-fat cream cheese. I get home and they gave me walnut honey cream cheese.. seriously, grrr.  And let me tell you even those small things have been bothering me. I use to be better at letting them go, but it seems it is happening all the time now! I am trying to have a better outlook and thus the lack of posting on my behalf. I don't want to be poor pitiful me and lately I have felt that way. So instead of trying to recap all the things that have happened since I last posted early December, I am going to start fresh and just leave you with silly pics of our very silly girl!

She likes to undress herself :-)

Get ready baby brother.. your sister likes to "help"

All things have not been negative in our life and I am so thankful by all the wonderful friends and family that have helped us out recently. I had a wonderful surprise baby shower dinner, friends and family over babysitting, doing laundry, wonderful donations of baby boy clothes and gifts of clothes, blankets, and baby essentials and so much more. We are truly blessed and cannot thank everyone for what they have done!!

Christmas Activities

This past weekend we had a lot of Christmas activities planned.

First, was breakfast with Santa in the neighborhood:

On the way to meet Santa we took it really slow or else there would have been lots of tears.

She was amazed by him for a second and then was over it!

She is a little daredevil. She is not afraid of heights :-) 

She loves the slide. We went back Sunday morning and she went down the slide over 20 times!

This is so much fun!

Then we went to the Christmas Tree farm! This was a first for Hadley AND Matt!

Someone was nice enough to take our picture! note-to-self: wear makeup

Hadley size Christmas tree!

Hadley had a blast feeding the goats!

She looks so cute all bundled up!

Finally, we had a Christmas party to go to. I didn't take my camera so I don't have any pictures, but she did great staying up so late (thankfully she took a 2 1/2 hour late nap before we went). There was a 6 year old girl and 4 year old boy there "babysitting" her and would not get out of her face! Luckily, Hadley is used to it with our two pups, but it was funny to see these kids hanging on her. If she went near the stairs you could hear them "no Hadley no" and blocking them from her. It was helpful at times because pretty much the whole party I spent chasing after her. I was ready to come home for sure. It was fun but tiring and I think my cold is now a sinus infection so that didn't help.

Sunday, we hung out at home and spent time with the Mike and Peggy. It was the first day I felt really really achy and tired because of pregnancy. No more second trimester bliss!

Hadley 17 months

Our almost 1 1/2 year old (how the time has flown) is laying in her crib right now "talking" to herself and kicking her legs on the mattress. It is 5:00 am and I cannot sleep (I will post why I have been up since 3:40 am in the baby k2 post coming up next) so I got up to work a little. I guess she heard me because she is yelling "bay bay" like she does when we come into her room in the morning. I think she is trying to tell me I am ready to get up.. and I am letting her know that it is not! I did get a bottle ready and was going to go change her and give her some milk if she kept up but after playing with glo-worm and talking to herself she is back asleep. That is my good girl!

Hadley at 17 months is...

... a happy girl!
Yesterday afternoon, I had a hair appointment, and Matt surprised me by showing up with Hadley along with a flower, chocolate and a gossip magazine. It was such a sweet surprise and after hearing he ventured to 2 other salons first because he didn't know where Tara moved to - it is even sweeter! Hadley was looking at me a little confused by all the foil in my hair and it took her a second before she ran over to me, but then she did and started her "whatsthat" while pointing at everything routine. I love that she asks me what everything is 24/7 - how else will she learn! She was smiling and very happy the whole time and the other ladies there just kept going on about how happy she was! I am not going to say she doesn't have her moments because SHE DOES, but overall she is just content with life.

The small things make her smile. She will run and I mean run around the house chasing Koda and then they switch and he chases her... she cracks up laughing and has the cheesiest grin on her face.

... a curious girl!

As I said above her favorite saying is "whatsthat" and will point to any and everything asking about it. Sometimes I think she is trying to test me. She knows certain body parts really well (nose, ears, eyes, mouth, belly button, feet, hair) and will point to my nose and ask me "whatsthat" and before I can answer she says "nose". If I ask her something she knows well she will give me a funny grin and point or say what it is like silly mommy you know that! If you take her picture (no one around here ever does ;-)) she runs over to see it. If she doesn't know what you are asking she puts her hands out to the side with the shoulder shrug of "i dunno know".

... a growing girl! 
She is eating pretty well these days and loves all fruit. We are having a harder time with making sure she eats all her vegetables. She does like them but to make sure she has enough we give her the Ella's Kitchen vegetable baby foods that are in the pouch and she loves it! She really likes yogurt as well. She will get that for dessert sometimes if I feel she just didn't eat enough of her dinner. She is learning to eat with utensils and although she picks up the food and places it on the fork and then in her mouth, she is getting better at it. She tests me all the time while she eats - she will take a piece of whatever she is eating and hold it over the edge of her high chair like she is going to drop it. I shake my head and say no and she does the same and then puts it back on the tray (sometimes). Sometimes she drops it... that girl!


She still has a morning bottle and evening bottle and if she is fighting a nap or we just want to make it really easy - she gets one then. I know by now she should be past that, but it works for us and I am not doing much to change it. I promise she will not be a 3 year old with a bottle.

... a helpful girl!
Hadley loves to help sweep, dust and vacuum. Or do anything we are doing - especially laundry! She loves to push the buttons and when she starts it she claps for herself and is so proud. We do a lot of clapping around our house.

Right now, we are lucky that she will bring us anything she finds on the ground. It is helpful, but I still freak out if she brings me something that could potentially hurt her if she tried to eat it or something. She has been good with the Christmas tree but has brought us a few ornaments without hooks on them so of course that worries us. We start crawling around and feeling for it but have yet to find one. I am sure it is still hanging in the tree. She will close the dishwasher even if you are not done loading it. In fact, she closes EVERYTHING. She doesn't like open doors or drawers. I wonder where she gets that from...

... a loving girl!
She still loves giving the puppies kisses. She will kiss your feet or legs if you are sitting down. I have no idea why we never kiss her feet ;-) She gives lots of kisses and hugs and is a lot more cuddly than she has been the last few months. I was shampooing the carpet when Matt and Hadley had left to go shopping and when they came back she was a little timid of this giant vacuum. She held onto Matt and had her head laying on his shoulder and boy was he eating it up! We had a few rough nights around Thanksgiving when she was getting up a few times at night and she would be so happy to see us when we would come into her room. Even though she was happy to see me she was very happy to see her daddy. She loves her daddy so much and loves to jump on him and tap on his back and run away playing the come get me game!

... a smart girl!
She catches onto things fairly quickly. We let her play with the iPad (and we are a t.v. watching family) and she knows how to open hers apps and play with some of them the way you are supposed to. There is one game with 5 animals to pick from and the name of the animal comes onto the screen and you have to pick the correct one and place it in the yellow circle. She doesn't know all the animals but understands the concept and knows some of the animals and gets those right every time.


... an active girl!
We have a girl on the move! She loves to run, climb, rock, dance, twirl and do anything on the move. She will keep you on your feet all day. We have a fun day planned for tomorrow so I am hoping because of all the activities there will be a nice nap for all!

Most of all Hadley is a true blessing to this family and it is easy to see during the holidays. I read stories of the struggles families have especially around this time and most are still trying to figure out how they can help others. Most everyone is just thankful for their healthy kids and even though they cannot get them gifts or pay all the bills they are reaching out to others to donate what they can (used toys, clothes, recipes.. whatever). I read one story that a lady is struggling pretty hard and she said she can knit and would be happy to knit a hat, animal anything for someone if she could. Someone responded saying how about you knit my daughter a hat and I will buy your kids Christmas presents.. .it is very inspiring and of course as a natural crier and being pregnant I just bawled my eyes out.

As I read and cried, I realized we are extremely blessed and although we are not well off and live pay check to pay check at times we are never without and we have friends and family that support, love and care for us. We are in a place where we can help.. we have reached out to help a family in need. I am sure many of you already do so and donate. Someone very wise told me "as you will learn, playing Santa is even more fun than being a kid" and they are very right. Not only is giving gifts more fun than receiving but helping out a grateful family is even more rewarding. We are truly thankful for all the blessing we have and cannot express to everyone what your love and support means to us.